Was this His decision?

[Fay Dickson-- AKA doofs]

Decision By The Inch: 

A man wakes up in the hospital, bandaged from head to foot. A doctor comes in and says "Ah, I see you've regained consciousness.  Now you probably don't remember but you were in a huge pile-up on the freeway. You're going to be ok, you'll walk and talk again, but your penis was severed in the accident and we couldn't find it." 

The man groans. 

The doctor goes on, "You have $9000 in insurance compensation coming and we now have the technology to build a new penis.  They work great but they don't come cheap. It's  roughly $1000 an inch." 

The man perks up. 

"So," the doctor says, "You must decide how many inches you want. But I understand that you have been married for over thirty years and this is something you should discuss with your wife.  If you had a five incher before and get a nine incher now she might be a bit put out. If you had a nine incher before and you decide to only invest in a fiver now, she might be disappointed. It's important that she plays a role in helping you make a decision." 

The man agrees to talk it over with his wife. 

The doctor comes back the next day. "So, have you spoken with your wife?" 

"Yes I have," says the victim. 

"And has she helped you make a decision?" 

"Yes" says the man. 

"What is your decision?" asks the doctor. 

"We're getting granite countertops."